15 Years & Counting

Was looking at my old blog posts and reminiscing the good old times. It was fun blogging back then when you are anonymous. Sort of like, you don’t even have to censor yourself or check your grammar repeatedly. After writing for a few more years, you gonna get haters. They threw all kinds of shades at you – grammar not on-pointe, you complained too much, other blogs are better.. (don’t read lah paan!!) etc etc. Haha. I don’t know how but I managed to survive. But I went off grid for awhile because I didn’t want too much attention.

Then I decided, screw it. I am going to blog only for myself. I am kinda glad that, I kept some of my stuff here. Thoughts, incidents, happenings, etc and it’s amazing to see how much I have grown. My own writing style somewhat mature and I could see myself beginning to let go.

I can’t believe I am been here the past 15 years. Even if there were only sporadic posts. But I glad, I managed to write about anything that’s important or not.. well, it’s just a record.

It’s been hell of a ride. I guess I will continue to jot down happenings before my memory fails me for good. I wish I was as hilarious as before but somehow my funny bones sort of left me. I believe I am funny in real life. I hope.

Blood Test Drama

Finally managed to haul my lazy ass to the doctor for annual blood test..actually I haven’t done my blood test annually for while…

The last one was back in 2010.

I admit my health wasn’t that good due to irresponsible eating and lack of exercise.

Heck! I am truly lucky because I didn’t suffer from high cholesterol even though I looked like one massive cholesterol laden Jabba the Hutt. No joke.

Even though I suspect I might be having some kind of diseases, the blood test ended up better than expected!

My borderline cholesterol went down.. LDL slightly high but less than it was in 2010. I was shocked. I asked doctor if this is acceptable, he said it’s ok since my HDL reading is alright.

Fatty liver actually reduced!

I guess it’s probably due to the detox I did to clean the gall bladder and liver. The gall bladder flushing.

Everything is good except blood sugar level. It was 6.6. I thought it was the onset towards diabetes but then my cousin asked me if I ate anything the night before which might cause the reading to fluctuate.

I scanned my brain for the last meal I had before the blood test… I realized I drank Milo and ate 3 cap ping pong biscuits during midnight because I was starving!!

Man! There goes my blood test’s accuracy. The food probably jack up my blood sugar.

I hope it’s true that we need to fast at least 12 hours before blood test for accuracy.

Doctor suggested that I take the OGTT (Oral glucose tolerance test) if I want accuracy. I guess I will do that if 3 months down the road, my blood work still shows signs of diabetes. This time I better remember not to drink or eat anything 12 hours before blood test!

Patient’s Patience

Finally managed to haul ass to get my blood test done. Been procrastinating for years! The last I did blood test was probably 2009! Ya.. hope there’s nothing to be worried about. I feel fine these few years except for some nagging pain in the knee.

Lucky the doctor didn’t give me an earful today. Blood taking was easier than I thought it would be.

Woke up early to get to the clinic only to be made to wait for 25 minutes. The doctor came in late apologetically. I should have learned from the past that he is always NOT punctual.

There were a few more patients before me. So altogether it took more than 1 hour to draw 3 vials of blood. Being initiative I collected the urine bottle one day prior.

After one patient came out, it was my turn. But one stupid woman barged inside to ask about some medicine. I am like… halo? Take a number la.

I just breathe in and out… count to 10 before I say something nasty. Then I decided I am better than that. Since I am not in a hurry, I just let her speak to the doctor for 5 minutes.

The parking meter was faulty. So I hope I won’t get any parking ticket when I go back to my car.

Guess pay it forward reaped good karma. There’s no parking ticket and I managed to tapao lor pan mein for breakfast.

Speaking of lor pan mein.. now I understand the agony my sister has to go through every time she ta pao lor pan mein for me every fortnightly.

The moronic shop.. always take their own sweet time to make your order. I think I waited 15 minutes for the pack even though there were less than 10 customers in the shop.

Too bad the noodles are simply too delicious to resist. So I guess good things come to those who wait.. so wait la! Ha ha.

Birthday Note

I was having a birthday dinner with some friends yesterday and I ordered a cup of flat white. I remember I could sleep easily even if I drink coffee before I go to sleep. I guess this is probably a definite sign of aging.. I couldn’t sleep a wink last night and was tossing around the bed. Decided to get up and play some games before trying to go back to sleep again.

Today is the re-occurrence of Valentine’s Day and Chap Goh Meh (Lunar calendar of love) coincide the same day. I was born 38 years ago on this special day where Lunar and Gregorian calendar celebrates love. I was told, this only happened once every 19 years! I still remember the day I was told of this, I was 19 and in college where I was having a time of my life. I remember I wore this light yellow shirt with a vest and jeans, acting all cool. Haha! And on that particular day my classmates celebrated my birthday and there was even a mysterious rose from a stranger. Haha. Those were the memories!

Ah well, being born on an auspicious day doesn’t make one’s destiny I guess. We still need to work hard, really hard. I don’t know when my break will come.. but I sure hope it would be soon.

I wrote in my birthday post last year that, the day was gloomy, dark and rainy. My perfect kind of weather. I guess this time, the sun decided to stay longer throughout the day. I could hardly peel my eyes open when I was driving home just now. The heat is unbearable. I hope and pray for rain to come soon as I could see the trees and grass along the roads are turning sadly yellow.

Well, here’s wishing you guys a very Happy Valentine’s Day and Chap Goh Meh! May love and happiness follow you wherever you go.

Fulfillment

I was looking at my long lost friends’ details in their Facebook. 16 years after we all went our separate ways after college. Most of my friends are now married with children. There are still a handful of us, who are the jolly singletons. Not sure whether it’s a real joy being single or not, afterall, we couldn’t see the “unhappiness” masked behind photos of holidays or doing something adventurous.

To be realistic, I guess most of us just prefer to share happy things instead of sad news. I think nobody in their right minds would write on their Facebook’s status – I just lost my job or I just broke up with the love of my life or I am so sad and lonely.

I was down with terrible sore throat, incessant coughs and flu for the long weekend that I had to take 2 days off on Thursday and Friday to sit home to nurse the heaving lungs. I really hate being sick. As I slept the weekend away, I’ve been bugged with terrible dreams. I couldn’t remember what the dreams are all about but they were sad, sad dreams.

I woke up, accessing my current state, looked at myself in the mirror and thought to myself. This is not the life I wanted. I don’t want to be confine in a normal office job with no challenges except having to have a positive attitude to deal with morons at work place. I don’t feel safe staying in the current house with no guards. I don’t feel any security in my job and even living in this country. Things tend to be overwhelming when you are sick and tired, I guess. Bad things simply blow out of proportions.

Then, a long lost friend buzzed me on Facebook to ask how am I and telling me that, she’s a mom of a 7 year old girl and a 4 year old boy. Believe me. I am truly happy for her! She’s this really sweet girl who always helped me with my Math when we were in A levels, which I am terrible in. Still am.

And she is still so skinny! And she didn’t even look like she’s 38, even after having two children. She is still this jolly self and not the usual soccer mom with life centered around her children. She travels a lot, has a successful business and a wonderful family.

That is indeed, I believe called a fulfillment. Something you have achieved in this lifetime that would give you good memories to live by till the end of your life.

Suddenly all these talking aroused the competitive monster in me which have been dormant for many years. I’ve come to a point where I think I am way too complacent. Nothing could be better than this.. of coz, there are still so many things could be better than the current state that I am now in. I wish I am living in another country right now. I wish I have a more fulfilling work to look forward to everyday. I wish I have a hobby or some work which would keep me occupied at odds ends so I don’t have to sit here, mopping around feeling sorry for myself.

I hope the physical sickness in me would go away soon.. and probably bring along the monster that kept stirring inside me now. Please go away, negative thoughts.Go away and don’t come back.